


Wings

by remanth



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Frottage, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sabriel - Freeform, Wings, wing!kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-26
Updated: 2014-03-26
Packaged: 2018-01-17 02:08:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1369999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remanth/pseuds/remanth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam keeps trying to get Gabriel to show him his wings but Gabriel can't. What Sam doesn't understand is the trauma Gabriel suffered a long time ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wings

“C’mon, Gabe, show them to me,” Sam cajoled, starting up a conversation they’d had several times before. He was sitting against the headboard of his bed, idly reading a book and stealing glances at Gabriel next to him. The archangel was popping Hershey’s kisses into his mouth as he watched television, the screen fixed to the wall where he’d snapped it into existence.

“I told you before, kiddo, no,” Gabriel replied easily, distractedly. He snapped and the channel changed, laughter emanating from a program that looked like a Japanese game show. It reminded Sam a little bit of the game show he’d been sent to with Dean a few years ago. “No one sees my wings.”

“Yeah, you’ve said that but you’ve never explained why,” Sam argued, dropping his book to his chest and slanting an annoyed look at Gabriel. “Seriously, what is it? With everything else we’ve done, why are your wings out of bounds?”

Gabriel shifted uncomfortably on the bed, resolutely ignoring the look Sam was shooting him. There was a tingling itch in his wings, one that had started as soon as Sam mentioned them. Most of the time, Gabriel could forget he even had the things. Ever since an accident that maybe wasn’t quite so accidental when he was much, much younger, Gabriel had kept his wings hidden. Even from his brothers and sisters. Perhaps especially from his brothers and sisters. After all, it had been Lucifer who’d ripped out the feathers and scarred his wings.

“Because they are,” Gabriel said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Besides, your senses are too dull to sense them. Might even burn your eyes out.”

“And I know that’s just an excuse,” Sam shot back, anger tingeing his voice. “I’ve had to deal with wounds to Cas’s wings and I can still see just fine. According to him, it’s all a matter of concentration for angels. So it’s a decision you are consciously making. And I’m asking you again: why, Gabe?”

“Because they’re private,” Gabriel muttered, letting the television disappear. The silence in the room was almost thunderous after the loud laughter. There were some things a guy could keep private, right? But memories of secrets and burdens shared ran through his mind and Gabriel sighed. Sam had been willing to share with him, had bared his soul even when he was terrified of what might lie buried. Their relationship had been rocky, trust slow in coming. But it had and now Gabriel couldn’t imagine a life without the tall hunter in it. After hearing Sam talk about being possessed and the power he’d wielded when drinking demon blood, could Gabriel keep his own terrors and insecurities buried?

“All right, fine,” Sam huffed, picking up his book and scanning the words to find the place he’d left off. “I thought we’d gotten past this part, Gabe. But if you don’t want to show me, it’s fine.”

Gabriel relaxed slightly, uncrossing his arms and snapping up a candy bar. He offered half to Sam, who took it out of reflex. One of the good things about angel-created food, or at least Gabriel-created food, was that it didn’t have any calories. Sam could eat as much as he liked and never worry getting out of shape. Though, with all the running he did, Gabriel doubted that would ever happen. They sat in silence for a couple more hours, Sam continuing the research he’d been doing and Gabriel trying to forget the memories dragged up by questions about his wings.

\------------------------------------------------------

A few days later, Gabriel had the bunker to himself. Sam and Dean were off on a hunt and Gabriel had conveniently absented himself before they’d left. Dealing with a skinwalker was simple for the Winchesters and Gabriel didn’t feel like exerting himself to help. Besides, he hated sitting in the back of the Impala. The thing just went so slow compared to his own powers of flight. And there was something Gabriel wanted to do while he was by himself, without any curious Winchesters around to ask questions.

“You need to stop procrastinating,” Gabriel grumbled to himself, sitting on the edge of his and Sam’s bed with his shirt off. It had taken him almost an hour to get to this point, his fingers flat-out refusing to do what he told them to do. The shirt, a simple white t-shirt, now sat pooled on his lap, fingers curled into fists in the fabric. While he hated the idea of it, Gabriel had to admit that he was very much a coward when it came to some things. Pulling out his wings and looking at them ranked at the top of that list, right behind running when he realized his family killing each other was inevitable. “Just do it while you still have time.”

Taking a deep breath to steady his nerves, Gabriel let his concentration lapse. Slowly, almost as if they sensed his terror, Gabriel’s wings faded into existence. The feathers rustled slightly as muscles unused to being free relaxed their tension. Gabriel felt the weight settle more fully onto his back and adjusted automatically. The weight felt familiar and the archangel had to swallow hard around a sudden lump in his throat. It felt _good_ to have his wings out, to let them stretch and move however they’d like. Sealing them away was like putting on a straightjacket. Over the centuries, Gabriel had gotten used to the feeling but that didn’t mean he liked it. Stretching his wings straight back, Gabriel let out a moan and sagged from his straight posture. It had been far too long since the last time he’d let his wings out and stretched them like this. Even while flying, Gabriel kept them tucked back and tight, only using the bare minimum needed to keep him going.

With another breath to give himself the courage, and possibly stall just a few seconds, Gabriel stretched his wings up and forward. The tips of golden brown feathers came into view, looking almost dusty from disuse. There were a few feathers that were actually broken while most were merely mussed. The last time Gabriel had had his wings out, he’d only managed a perfunctory grooming before pushing them away again. As he continued to stretch forwards, more of his wings came into view. The tips led to full feathers, hanging down somewhat bedraggled from the bottom of his wings, layer upon layer rustling softly. The upper edge of Gabriel’s wings curved gracefully, culminating in the top of the pinion. Though that was were Gabriel’s eyes skipped over until he forced himself to look. That was were the damage had been done. The damage that could not be undone. It had been far too long since Gabriel had looked at those spots, right on the top of his wings.

Looking at them now was the hardest thing he’d ever done. Gabriel felt his breath rattle in his throat as he lowered his wings so that the curve of the pinion was at his eye level. There was a slight burn through his back and at the base of his wings but it was the burn of a really good stretch. As he ran his eyes over the damage on his wings, tears pricked at Gabriel’s eyes. It had started out as harmless fun, really. He, Lucifer, and Michael had been playing in the Garden, running on the bright green grass. Gabriel had been young then, still idolized his eldest brothers. Then Michael had been called away and it had just been him and Lucifer. A change came over Lucifer’s face then, something feral and cold that glinted from his eyes. Gabriel had felt afraid but didn’t know what it was. Fear wasn’t something he’d ever experienced and this was his brother. 

Without warning, Lucifer had lunged forward and grabbed Gabriel’s wings, fingers digging into meat and bone painfully. Gabriel had yelped and tried to pull away but Lucifer had been so much stronger. Had always been stronger. The blunt pain of Lucifer’s grip was replaced by a much sharper pain as the elder archangel started ripping out feathers. Screaming and crying, Gabriel had twisted and writhed in Lucifer’s grip, causing even more damage to himself in his panic to get away. But Lucifer had continued to hold him, stripping feathers from the curve of his wing until bare skin was unearthed. Then came the worst part. Laughing softly, Lucifer had taken his angel blade and sliced across the skin in precise lines. Gabriel’s screams had turned hysterical then, echoing throughout the Garden. Help had come, eventually, in the form of Raphael and Uriel but not in time. The worst of the damage had been done. Now, there would forever be scarring on Gabriel’s wings in the precise lines Lucifer had carved into them.

A tear trickled down his cheek as Gabriel traced over the scars on his right wing. He’d waited for years afterward for the feathers to grow back, avoiding Lucifer as he did so. The elder archangel had gotten a stern lecture and basically a slap on the wrist from their father before being allowed to go his own way again. Gabriel’s wounds had been tended carefully by Raphael and he’d been thankful the damage hadn’t been even worse. He could still fly. But, once his wings healed fully and it was obvious the scarring was permanent, Gabriel had hidden his wings away and developed a distance with Lucifer. Even now, looking at the bare skin with the straight, carved lines, Gabriel could remember the burning pain in his wings and the torn feeling in his throat as he screamed. 

“I survived,” Gabriel told himself, wiping the tear away. He blinked a few times, gaze resolutely fixed on his wings. “And Lucifer is gone. There’s no shame in this pain. It wasn’t something I could have avoided.”

Though it didn’t make him feel all that much better, Gabriel felt something ease a little inside himself. He’d forgotten how could it felt to have his wings free, to allow himself to be completely himself. The mask he’d worn as Loki the trickster god had become comfortable, a lie he’d told himself over and over until he’d believed it. After all, with the pitying looks Gabriel had gotten from his family even after he’d learned how to hide his wings, it was easier to be someone else. Stretching out his hands again, Gabriel started straightening feathers and pulling out the broken ones. There weren’t quite as many of those as he’d feared, though there were more than there should be. By the time he was done with the broken feathers, there was a neat pile at his side on the bed. Maybe he’d give them to Sam as a peace offering. After all, angel feathers could be used in some spells that the Men of Letters had known. Crossing his legs underneath him on the bed, Gabriel shifted into a more comfortable position and started grooming his feathers in earnest. It felt comforting and familiar and Gabriel let his mind wander as his hands worked from muscle memory. He became so lost in pleasant memories that he forgot the time and didn’t hear the steps coming closer to the room.

“Hey, Gabe, we’re back!” Sam’s voice called, the hunter opening the door and stepping inside. “Turns out Garth was already on the skinwalker’s trail and he took care... of... it.”

Sam’s voice trailed off as he took in the sight of Gabriel on the bed with one wing stretched out behind him and one curled up around him and resting in his lap. The sight was absolutely beautiful and Sam let out a small gasp of awe at finally seeing Gabriel’s wings. They were the same colors as his eyes and hair, the gold and brown mingling in patterns throughout the feathers. Then his eyes fell on the scarred patches on the curve of Gabriel’s wings and a flash of sorrow ran through Sam. Who could possibly want to hurt Gabriel, ruin the breathtaking beauty of his wings? As Sam stepped forward, one hand raised itching to touch, Gabriel’s eyes snapped open. He’d finally heard Sam’s breathing, heard the footsteps and came back to himself. Yet he could only focus on one thing, see Sam’s outstretched hand and remember the blood dripping off Lucifer’s once Uriel had pried him away.

“No, stop,” Gabriel whimpered and mantled his wings over himself. Lucifer was trapped, wasn’t he? There was no way he could get out. “You can’t hurt me again, Lucifer.”

“What?” Sam asked, shock clear in his voice. “Gabe, look at me. It’s not Lucifer, it’s Sam. Look at me, Gabe.”

Gabriel shook his head at first but looked up as Sam continued urging him quietly. His voice was completely different from Lucifer’s, from the tone to the cadence to even the words used. That voice meant warmth and, oddly enough, safety. Maybe it was Sam’s height or maybe the way he knew how to kill pretty much anything but Gabriel had never felt afraid with Sam. Meeting Sam’s eyes let Gabriel relax even further. There was nothing of anger and danger in them and everything of sympathy and love. Slowly, Gabriel let his wings fold back over his shoulders and rest partly on the bed. He’d been long finished with the grooming anyways and had just been smoothing and re-smoothing the feathers. Sam smile and held out his hand again, waiting until Gabriel nodded to move forward.

“I see you’re back, kiddo,” Gabriel said quietly, leaning into Sam’s side as Sam settled down onto the bed. He concentrated for a few moments, willing his wings to fade away into the nothingness they usually inhabited. It happened slower this time, as if they were reluctant to go. 

“Please don’t do that,” Sam said quietly as patches of golden brown feathers started disappearing. “They’re beautiful, Gabriel, really. Why do you hide them?”

“You can’t have missed it,” Gabriel replied dryly, though he stopped pushing his wings back into the pocket dimension he’d created. He let them reappear fully, shaking the feathers to settle them. “The bald patches on the top riddled with scars. _That’s_ why I leave them hidden. I trusted someone once and he... tortured me.”

“I’m sorry,” Sam murmured sincerely, wrapping an arm carefully around Gabriel’s waist. He brushed against a few feathers, not really surprised at how soft they felt. “You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” Gabriel laughed wryly but then he tilted his head to the side as he considered it. There was none of the shame and fear he usually felt when thinking of people seeing his wings. Not with Sam. Maybe if he told the hunter the story, he could finally get past it? Or at least enough that he didn’t keep his wings completely hidden and bound? So Gabriel told Sam the whole story, leaning harder into the hunter for support when he got to the blade cutting such precise lines on his wings. “So it got to the point where it was easier to hide than to face what my family felt about what happened. There’s only so much pity I can stomach, you know kiddo?”

“I get that,” Sam nodded, rubbing a hand over Gabriel’s back and being careful not to touch his wings. Not yet as much as he might want to. “And God didn’t do a thing back then about Lucifer, knowing what a dick he was?”

“No, I guess the general consensus was that Lucifer took whatever game he was playing too far,” Gabriel laughed bitterly, wrapping his arms around his stomach and holding tightly. “At least, that’s the story I got. I was really young then and my older brothers wanted to shelter me from what happened. Though it wasn’t too long after that that Lucifer rebelled. But it’s all over with and he’s trapped in his cage again. Nothing to worry about anymore.”

“You got that right,” Sam replied fiercely, angry all over again at Lucifer. But the feeling faded; such anger wouldn’t do any good now. He’d already had his revenge against the archangel who’d possessed him. “Thank you for telling me and I’m sorry for pushing you before. If I had known, I would have left it alone.”

“It’s all right, kiddo,” Gabriel replied, his tone lightening as his usual jovial self reasserted itself. He looked up at Sam and winked. “Guess it was good for me in the end. Got me to let my wings out again at least. Been a long time.”

“I’m glad I got to see them,” Sam said, unable to keep the naked longing out of his voice. “They’re just like your eyes. Do all angels have different colored wings? How does the coloring work?”

“It depends on the angel,” Gabriel laughed, not at all surprised that Sam was asking so many questions. “Archangels had different colors for their wings but a lot of the lesser-ranked angels had the same color. Having a different color than everyone else was partially an indication of rank.”

Gabriel studied Sam as they talked, Sam asking continuous questions and Gabriel doing his best to answer them. Some things just couldn’t be explained in human terms nor in a way Sam would understand. The desire to touch was clear in Sam’s eyes but Gabriel appreciated that he never forced the issue. Sitting there, talking and touching like they normally did was good and helping to ease Gabriel into his decision. After all, this was Sam. There was no way the hunter would ever hurt him and Gabriel wanted to share everything with him. There was another reason he’d kept his wings private. Another reason why angels didn’t touch all that often.

“So, have I sated your curiosity for now?” Gabriel asked as Sam’s questions finally trailed off.

“Yeah, I think so,” Sam smiled leaning down to press a kiss to Gabriel’s temple. “I think I learned more about angels tonight than I have in the last five years.”

“Good because, if I know you and I’m pretty sure I do, there’s something you want to do,” Gabriel replied, for once nothing flirty in his tone. “You want to touch my wings?”

“I would, if you’re okay with that Gabe,” Sam said, eyes lighting up. He’d wanted to see Gabriel’s wings since he’d found out the guy was an angel. But actually being able to touch? “You sure you’ll be able to handle it?”

“I’m not gonna break, kiddo,” Gabriel said dryly, rolling his eyes. He felt... purged was the word that fit best. Maybe keeping that story inside and hiding hadn’t been the best plan. “Go ahead.”

Sam took a deep breath, awed and humbled that he was getting the chance to touch an angel’s wings. He went slowly, warnings that an angel’s wings were private and important and a direct manifestation of grace running through his mind. Starting at the end of one of the feathers, Sam let his fingers trail up the center of it. It was soft and fluttered gently, making a quiet swishing sound. The top of the feather hid underneath another layer of feathers overlapping it and Sam let his hand run down the next layer. But sitting next to Gabriel made things a little awkward and Sam shifted on the bed until he was sitting cross-legged behind Gabriel. Both wings spread out to either side, easily touching the walls. Wanting to touch every inch of Gabriel’s wings, Sam started again at the base where they grew from Gabriel’s shoulder blades. The feathers grew seamlessly from skin, little ones closest to Gabriel’s back that grew in size as they went up. Sam let his fingers dig down through the feathers and scrape gently across the skin underneath. He stopped when Gabriel gasped, suddenly worried that he’d managed to hurt the archangel.

“Don’t stop, Sam, that felt good,” Gabriel reassured him, looking over his shoulder at Sam.

Sam nodded and continued his exploration. He moved with more confidence, no longer using hesitant, fluttering touches. As Sam worked his way up the outer edge of Gabriel’s right wing, Gabriel relaxed back against him and closed his eyes. The sensations were intense, moreso than he’d expected. Then again, the last time he’d let anyone touch his wings was when Raphael was trying to heal the scarring. This... this was different. When Sam’s hand reached the bare patch at the curve of Gabriel’s pinion, he didn’t pause. Something caught in Sam’s chest as he rubbed gently over the scars. So much pain evident in these simple lines. But that was all in the past and Sam concentrated on the warm and pliant archangel in front of him. Impulsively, Sam leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the back of Gabriel’s neck as he tightened his grip on Gabriel’s wing. The reaction was unexpected but definitely pleasant. Gabriel moaned quietly, his whole body going limp against Sam’s.

“Well, isn’t that interesting,” Sam drawled in Gabriel’s ear, nipping at the shell of it. “Wonder what else will make you moan like that?”

“Why don’t you find out?” Gabriel shot back, letting his wings drape back over Sam. Laughing quietly, Sam buried his hands in the feathers. He paid special attention to the underside of the wings when Gabriel hissed in a sharp breath. Scraping his nails over the skin and squeezing over the bone, Sam managed to get several more moans and a few swears out of Gabriel. He kept pressing kisses to the back of Gabriel’s neck and his shoulders, licking around the base of Gabriel’s wings. There was a tingling in his hands now, almost like electricity emanating from the feathers. It was intensely arousing and Sam shifted a little on the bed, trying to ignore the erection that was starting to make itself known.

A snap made Sam focus on Gabriel’s hands and he realized the archangel had just disappeared both of their clothes. Which was perfectly okay with Sam. Resting his head on Gabriel’s shoulder, Sam watched as Gabriel fisted his hands into the sheets on the bed. Strangled groans escaped his throat as Sam ran his hands through his wings. That his ministrations were having the same effect on Gabriel was obvious as the archangel had an erection of his own. Soon, Gabriel’s hips were making little thrusting motions in time with Sam’s hands, breath heaving in his chest. There was a desperate tone to his moans now, a pleading as Gabriel whimpered Sam’s name.

“What do you want, Gabe?” Sam whispered, watching as Gabriel thrust his hips into the air. 

“I want to touch,” Gabriel moaned as Sam ran his nails down the front of one wing. “Damn, kiddo, I need it.”

“Go ahead,” Sam encourage, one hand wrapping around Gabriel’s chest to roll one nipple between his fingers. “Show me what you want, Gabe.”

Gabriel’s hand immediately let go of the sheets and slid up his leg to his erection. Wrapping his fingers around it, Gabriel stroked up and down slowly moaning as he did so. Sam watched avidly, nipping and sucking at Gabriel’s neck a he continued to stroke Gabriel’s wings. As Gabriel started thrusting harder with his hips, Sam fit himself against Gabriel’s back and moved with him. Soon, their paces matched and Gabriel threw his head back, panting out Sam’s name. It only took a few strokes on his erection combined with Sam’s hand in his wings before Gabriel was orgasming. Gabriel stiffened in Sam’s hold, a strangled scream caught in his throat as he pumped up and down.

“That’s it, you’re gorgeous like this Gabe,” Sam whispered as he ground his hips into Gabriel’s. When Gabriel caught his breath, he pulled his wing out of Sam’s hold and turned.

“Your turn, Sam,” Gabriel said, pulling Sam into a deep kiss. Sam groaned when Gabriel’s hand, still slick and warm, wrapped around his erection. Threading his hands into Gabriel’s hair and tugging, Sam thrust into Gabriel’s hand. Wings wrapped around him, warm and soft and utterly erotic as they brushed his back and shoulders and legs. Gabriel kissed him almost desperately, tongue driving hard into Sam’s mouth. It took a little longer but Sam soon felt tension and warmth coil in his belly. Breaking the kiss, Sam screamed as he came, hips thrusting hard forward. Gabriel pressed kisses to Sam’s neck and collarbone as he rode out the orgasm, hand slowing down.

“You are just as gorgeous,” Gabriel told him, pulling Sam into a hug and kissing him tenderly. A snap later and they were both clean. There were definitely benefits to sleeping with an archangel. Sam let Gabriel push him down onto his back on the bed and pull the covers up over both of them. His wings fluttered quietly as Gabriel tried to find a comfortable position for them. They hung off the bed and that was rather uncomfortable.

“Don’t make them disappear just yet?” Sam asked sleepily, running a hand down one golden brown feather.

“Since you asked nicely,” Gabriel replied teasingly, draping his wings over both Sam and himself. That was more comfortable and Sam seemed to enjoy it. Threading his fingers into the feathers, Sam pressed a sleepy kiss to Gabriel’s lips. Gabriel rested a hand on Sam’s chest and relaxed against him. “Sleep, kiddo.”

“Yeah, sounds like a good idea,” Sam nodded and yawned. He closed his eyes, savoring the feel of wings around him. “Love you, Gabe.”

“Love you too, Sam,” Gabriel whispered, smiling tenderly at Sam. Gabriel watched as Sam fell asleep, breath evening out to a steady pace. And finally felt completely at peace and whole.


End file.
